My Valentine

When we met, we were both in the arts, there were no strings, no mortgage, no expectations. Parenting and life have changed that.

We are moving into a new phase, and though there is so much uncertainty, the constant is this: He is my valentine. My history, and a very deep part of who I am. I am more myself when I am with him.

Some say that Valentine's Day is just a Hallmark holiday, invented to lure poor saps into spending money. That may be so, I'm just cynical enough to believe that story. But that doesn't mean it's not a great idea. Because sometimes it's important to have a date on the calendar that's about nothing but celebrating love, in all it's crazy, wonderful forms.

And about remembering beginnings and the love that's gotten us this far.

My Funny Valentine(s)

I was talking yesterday to a much younger co-worker. She was telling me about her boyfriend, and describing all his good qualities. They are all important qualities to have, I said.

But does he make you laugh?

Maybe it's just me, but nothing is sexier to me than a funny man. Handsome will turn heads, but funny makes you stick around. But it has to be smart funny. Smart funny is harder to find.

Of course, smart funny without kind is no fun. They have to have a kind heart, be the sort of man who might, oh, bring your lunch to work if they thought you forgot it because they were worried you wouldn't have anything to eat. Even if it might behoove you to miss a meal or two. And they wouldn't say anything about THAT either, because they love you no matter what, and think you're sexier than anyone in the world. (Except maybe Charlize Theron. I understand, honey. She's on my list too.)

It also helps if they can make a really great cup of coffee. A great cup of coffee every morning for fourteen years of married life is a huge contribution to wedded bliss.

Does he listen to you? I mean, really listen? Because I can verify that lots of men can talk. But it's love if they listen. Especially when you have pms.

Oh, and that reminds me: Is he brave? Can he tell you, even though he is putting himself in grave danger, that the real reason you might be so pissy is because you have pms?

Those are just a few of the reasons I married my husband. Mostly though, I married him because I feel more like myself when I am with him.

I was so smart to say yes. And so lucky, that all these years later, I have not one, but two funny Valentines.





Thank you my sweet, comic Valentine. You make me smile with my heart.

my funny valentine(s)

Smart, funny men are my weakness. I am a gal who loves humor, as you may have noted from some of my posts. It is by far a surer way to my heart than, say, flowers and candy (unless it's chocolate, then it's a tie). When I met my husband, we were working on an industrial film together, and the jokes he kept lobbing were for me and me alone (no one else in the room seemed to get them). Our courtship was intense, and there were times I thought for sure it was the end, but he had the funny, this guy, and he kept coming back, and well, sixteen years later, here we are. We are parents who deal with the mundane everyday stuff, but almost every day he makes me laugh. He makes me think. And he stirs my heart.

He knows me, too. What makes me tick, what gets my goat, what will make my eyes fill with tears (I am a huge sap, although less sappy than I used to be), and what will make me laugh out loud. We've been through the mill together, and have had some truly hard times. There are times when I don't understand what's in his head, but I never doubt his love for me, or my love for him. We scrap it out when it's tough, and we truly enjoy each other's company when it's not.

And our son. Our son is a perfect combination of the two of us, and his own unique person. He has his Dads' killer sense of humor and his Moms' love of a bad pun. One of our treats (if he doesn't have school on Friday) is to snuggle in our bed and watch "The Office" or "Monk" with me. He LOVES The Office. Luckily, most of the grown-up jokes sail over his head, but he gets the funny. He thinks Dwight is hilarious. So imagine how excited he was that his Dad picked out the perfect Valentine's present for him to present me with this morning. He could hardly contain himself, but he did. Admirably. He's cute, funny, smart AND he can keep a good secret.

His Daddy picked a beautiful present for me, too: a tiny little gold heart with three tiny rubies in it. It's perfect. He's funny, smart, sexy AND he knows how to shop.

Lucky, lucky me.

my valentine

"I have a crush on you. You know that? I think you're beautiful."
My son as he was getting in the tub the other night, as I helped him out of his shirt and he reached over and stroked my cheek.
You could have mopped me up with a thirsty towel and I'd still be mostly a puddle on the floor.

We've been getting ready for Valentine's Day for the last few days here. Joe-Henry wrote out most of his cards that we needed to get in the mail, and last night finished all the cards for his class. He took great care in choosing the cards for his classmates, making sure that each child got the card that he thought they'd like the most. He got the cards that had kitties and puppies on them, that said things like "It's puppy love" and "You're as cute as a kitten!". I love that he didn't want to get superhero or Cars Valentines (even though he loves them), but that he wanted to get these sweet little animals. It's kind of the last vestige of his "pink" phase - which he no longer wears because it's a "girl color", even though last year he was sporting pink and orange striped galoshes and pink converse tennis shoes. He also had princess costumes in his dress-up box along with batman and ninjas, and recently had me take them out and give them away. "Those are girl things, mom". I miss that little guy that wanted to be Ariel for Halloween, but I also love this new little "macho" kid that recently wanted to watch Basketball on tv. His dad is such metrosexual -he's not into sports (although he enjoys watching them from time to time, we aren't glued to ESPN), loves to shop, and loves reading and music. Sports just aren't really on our radar, but I suppose if he wanted to play something, we'd be all for it.

But right now, we like puppies and kitties and music and snuggling. And the occasional Basketball game on t.v. I feel like I've won the kiddo lottery.

Happy Valentine's Day!