Sex sells. Isn't this what they tell us? Sell us?
Well, I've decided that we need to sex up some basic rules for living in civilized society, things that just make sense but we never really think about. Also to catch the attention of the younger generation.
When you wait on me, and don't talk on your cell phone, my panties get damp.
Politeness is HOT. Giving up your seat or place in line to an elderly, infirm or pregnant person? You can eat whipcream off my chest. (or straight out of the can if that doesn't do it for you).
If you are driving in front of me, or are stopped at a light in a car facing mine, I will TONGUE KISS YOU if you use your turn signal.
Being on time, good service, doing your job without an attitude make me MOIST.
Hey waiter, slow down with those menu specials.... yeah, that's it, baby. make it last.
Paying taxes hurts? Ohhhhh, bend me over and hurt me again! Roads, schools, hospitals, police.....
If you are trying to get through the express lane with more than the allotted amount of items, I will give you a lap dance if you get the hell out of my way.
Hey there, bearded skateboarder, you'd look SO MUCH HOTTER in a helmet on the sidewalk than plastered to the front of my car!
These are just a few ideas.... please feel free to add your own, and let's get this party started!
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2 comments:
i'm afraid i'll disapoint you with what i did today annie. i was crossing a very busy highway, cars swarming by. i was standing in an area in the middle waiting for my chance to run. this young punk came really close to me in his car and screeched something loudly to frighten me. it shook me to my core. and then i showed him my middle finger. ugh. totally immature on my part, but fear became anger and well..no excuses really..
Lisa, I applaud your discretion. I would have chased him down, hauled him out of his car and sat on him until he apologized!
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