Friday, January 19, 2007

aaaaaarrrrggggghhh

Joe-Henry has been off school all week due to Monday's Martin Luther King Jr. holiday and then snow. I thought for sure he'd go back today - the roads are clear and the snow nearly melted. But I went on the district website to check and there is.....

"No a.m. kindergarten". Why!? Dear Sweet Jesus, WHY?

Help!!! I am just not mentally prepared for one more day building legos! I was looking forward to two quiet hours getting things done that I need to get done. Don't get me wrong - I love love love spending time with my son, but I think we are both at the breaking point.

I'm about to take you for a scary ride. You are about to go inside the head of a mother who is on "Unexpected Day 5 of No School" (different from "Planned Day 5 of No School" because there's, well, a PLAN). Put on your helmet - it might get bumpy..


Alright. Think fast. Coffee, first and foremost. Yes. That's good. Now, let him sleep in, that buys an extra half hour. Use that time to read the paper to wake up brain, and think woman! Get out of the house. Costco? The post office? The park is too cold and wet and muddy yet. But getting him dressed to go out and run ERRANDS on a day when he doesn't have school will take at least two hours because he drags his feet. That's the reality. Don't fight it. We're in the house this morning, think "in the house". Okay, first, breakfast. He can stretch that to half hour. Then what? Crafts? Yeah, right. Games? Not "Chutes and Ladders" please, I'd rather stick a fork in my eye, but maybe Uno. That's a half hour tops taken care of. Cars and trains? More my husband's milieu than mine, but I've been known to get on the floor and crash a few cars. Okay, that's fifteen minutes taken care of. There's also the lego helicopter that didn't get built yesterday. Of course, the legos are iffy - I always wind up building it, getting engrossed in the visual instructions, while he turns on the tv and then pipes up in a half hour to ask me for a snack. I'll ask him why he's not helping and he'll hold up the one tiny part in his hand and say, "But Mom, I AM helping!" Also, if the t.v. goes on, there is a huge fight to turn it off. Every time. You'd think I'd learn. They say that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome. Watching t.v. in our house fits that description. We turn a bit crazy if it's on for over an hour. Okay, so no legos until afternoon. Dance party? That would be good for both of us. Could I get him to dance while helping me sort the mountain of laundry that needs to be done? Wait - first, call the plumber because the laundry is still dripping. That's why there's a mountain of it. Plumber first, then laundry. Okay..... what else. Bus trip! Max Train! YES. A trip to downtown Portland! An adventure. That's what we'll do. Get a few chores done, then hop a train downtown. Alright, I think we've got something. Then, once we're out of the house, errands can be run. Crisis averted.

You may take off your helmets now. We hope you enjoyed your trip.

2 comments:

suttonhoo said...

lol! how did the field trip work out?

Franklin5 said...

Allrighty. Under the cloak of darkness, as the family sleeps, I have finally made the leap to new Blogger. This means that, at long last, I am able to register a comment to tell you how much I'm loving your blog. You were kind enough to drop me an encouraging comment some time ago, and both Mr. F5 and I came running over here to see what you had to say; we were suitably impressed.

Hopefully this won't seem creepy: I'm linking your blog on mine. If it does, just let me know and I'll remove it promptly with no hard feelings. If not, then prepare yourself for a flood of new readers (i.e., the three people who currently read my blog, excluding my mother, who is inexplicably frightened by hyperlinks).

Thanks!