I'm in a restaurant with fabulous food, cooked by someone else, with sparkling, beautiful dishes that will be done by someone else. I am not interrupted while I speak, my best girlfriends are there and there is lots of red wine and dark chocolate. At the bar are Steve Carrell, Steve Zahn, Jon Stewart and George Clooney, all smelling really nice. They all make eyes at us, then come to our table to join us, buying us drinks and flaming desserts, and everyone tells me that I am the smartest, funniest, sexiest woman they've ever met. They all tell jokes and make brilliant conversation, and my eyes glaze over because I have a great buzz on from the wine and the chocolate and speaking with adults. My husband walks in and takes me in his arms and drives me home. So to speak. Leaving my girlfriends with the Steves, Jon and George.
Everyone calls the next day to dish on who had who, and they all tell me that all anyone could talk about was how smart and funny I was, and they couldn't believe that I could do crafts and organize a Bingo night and make instant mac&cheese ALL IN THE SAME DAY.
I am a goddess.
4 days ago